Surgery Update

Well, it was touch and go there for a while but I am going to have the hardware taken off my foot Wednesday afternoon. I ran a fever Sunday and Monday and felt crappy. I called Dr. Malusky first thing Monday morning. Since there was no site of pain or obvious infection I had to do the hated "don't take any tylenol and see how high it goes today". When it reached 101.6 I decided to take tylenol. The fever is down today. I had a history and physical from the doctor at Riverview. Since the fever is down, I am already on antibiotics and they are just taking something out she OK'd the surgery. She also did a CBC and since I haven't heard anything I assume it was OK.

Just like the swollen arm this stuff really throws me. The big stuff I could handle. This relatively piddly stuff is harder. The doctor at Riverview said off-handedly that I could add professional patient to my job list. That also shocked me. Should I have smacked her or cried? Both were viable options at the time. It is a job I will gladly quit.

This has been a lost year. There has been no semblance of normal. I can understand why people refuse a second round of chemo. How long will the chemo extend your life? How much life do you lose in the mean time. What will be the quality of the life you have?

Complications

I woke up early Friday morning and my right hand and arm were really swollen. I have little hands with prominent bones and veins. My hand was so swollen I couldn't see the veins. I went back to bed and propped the arm on a pillow. I called Dr. Hick's office as soon as it opened and they had me come in right away. Since they took out so many lymph nodes with the mastectomy we were all thinking lymphadema. I did have an ultrasound of the arm to make sure there weren't any clots or anything else strange going on. Now I have an appointment with an OT for a lymphadema eval and possible treatment. At this stage it is hard to tell if it is just swelling from excessive word processing and beading, delayed reaction to the placement of the breast expander or truly lymphadema.

I talked to my youngest sister, Beth. She is a lymphadema specialist. After talking to her I also found some websites with the techniques we talked about that had pictures! I am so visual I needed pictures or drawings of the areas I am supposed to work with. So now I have something I can do until I can get in for the eval.

I can't believe how shook up I was by all of this. It really threw me for a loop. It seems like the closer I get to "normal" the fewer emotional reserves I have, especially for any glitches in my health.

Introducing Bob

Here is my new cat.  His name is Bobcat because of his Manx tail but I call him Bob.  I know, a bit strange but it is better than Stumpy and it amuses me.  Such an innocent face and such a busy and ornery kitten.  He discovered my beading tray last night and the results were not good.  There were beads all over the floor.  Then I had to put him in kitty prison (laundry room) because he thought that trying to get the beads up off the floor was a good game and kept jumping in them.  I was not amused!

While we are doing show and tell, here is a picture of my external fixator.  I am supposed to get it off next Wednesday but supposedly there is a "conversation" going on with my insurance company.  With all the medical expenses I have had this year I am surprised there haven't been more conversations.  

I still have my drains in from the insertion of the breast spacers.  So I am lumpy, gimpy, and hairless.  Actually the hairless part isn't quite true anymore.  Except for the top front of my head the hair does cover my scalp.  Maybe it covers more than I think but it is hard to tell because of all of the gray.  So I guess that makes me lumpy, gimpy and gray.  I seem to be in need of amusement these days because it takes such a long time to get back to a real normal life.  I wore my cowboy hat to amuse myself today.  Melissa, my administrative assistant, really thinks she should inherit the hat.  She does look good in it.  But just think how good I will look in it once I have real hair instead of long fuzz.

Rough Week

It has been a rough week. The surgery to put the spacers in for the breast implant was harder on me than I thought it would be. I feel like this is the first day I have really been coherent. No energy, running a fever, everything is so much of an effort. Gee, this sounds familiar. It might have something to do with having a general anesthetic for the second time in three weeks. What was I thinking? Oh, yeah, I wanted everything done so I was ready to go back to work without any more interruptions. Silly me.

I saw both surgeons on Friday. The stitches were removed from the foot and plans are being made to take the fixator off the last week of August. They are working on a date. I am writing this on my Ipad and can't post pictures but when I get to a PC I will post a picture of my foot with the contraption on it. It is quite something. I see Dr. Hicks again on Tuesday. I really do need to expand my social life beyond Dr's offices.

Speaking of social life Trish came down to hang out with me today. I have been really depressed this week - medicine, pain, feeling crappy and overwhelmed, it's a well deserved depression and about time - who knows why? Any how, it is always good to hang out with my sis. Except for a little when we were pre-teens there has never has been much sibling rivalry between us. Now though I think I am going to beat her for the most surgeries in one year. We decided we need to assure the younger sister, Beth, that she doesn't need to do anything to try to beat us.

Surgery Report

Surgery went well. I was in a lot of pain they couldn't get under control so I stayed overnight in the hospital. I came home Tuesday evening and have been zonked every since. Typing is a major issue because I make so many errors. I have decreased the pain medicine so I can wakeup a bit. I am supposed to take it easy for a couple of weeks. Restrictions are always more than I am led to expect. My plan was to just get up and go.

What's His Name

I received a surprise new member to my household yesterday. A friend of my granddaughter found a kitten after a rainstorm last week and I have inherited the little fuzzball. Becky and Jerrika took him to the vet for me. He's about six weeks old and is part Manx and healthy. He has the Manx characteristic of a very stumpy tail and longer back legs. He is a very fuzzy gray. He looks so funny from behind. He almost looks like he hops but I can't tell if that is just kitten enthusiasm or a factor of the breed. So far Leo is more or less ignoring him.

I am still trying on names. Jerrika was calling him Blue, because of his coloring. I am calling him Baby Blue, Blue Boy, Little Bit or Fuzzball. I like Little Bit best but perhaps that will not be such a good name for a grown up cat. Stormy has also been suggested. It seems strange to me to call a gray cat blue but I am finding that it is common. After Suzy Q got lost I decided that I would not actively look for another cat but let the universe bring one to me. If he were a girl I would name him Karma or Serendipity. Those aren't very good names for a boy. I suppose I could call him Chance.

Whatever his name is he is a good distraction from my aching joints and the upcoming surgery.

Not So Much

So, I don't have as much freedom as I thought I would because of pain and stiffness. It is a combination of being in a fairly static position for over two weeks and stopping anti-inflammatories because of the surgery on Monday. I am downright miserable. My knees, hips and low back hurt. I can't seem to find a comfortable position. And walking is very slow. I move like the Tim Conway character in the old Carol Burnett show - making a lot of effort and not getting very far. There go all of my plans of hopping in the car and doing stuff. Not happening!

Yesterday when I went to campus I had the benefit of my friend Colleen's scooter. Nan rode it out to the car for me amd I drove it in. I felt like a danger to myself amd others!! It was difficult to get used to the controls. Once I got to the office I left it outside in the hall. It is definitely nice to have it.

On the home front I am restless and out of sorts. I can't concentrate on anything for very long. The seroma is really big now. The size increased with all of that extra use of the arms with the wheelchair. I am nervous about the breast reconstruction. I am also realizing that if I want a breast that looks normal with a nipple and areola that is two additional surgeries. Isn't this ever going to end? Unfortunately, I know the answer to that question is no.

Freedom

Yeah, I can walk!!! Of course my back, knees and hips are stiff after more than 2 weeks without walking. I was planning to go into campus today but I was walking like a pretzel and was a little unsteady when I got home. I decided to walk around the house a lot today and work the kinks out and go to work in the morning. It is so wonderful to be able to just stand up and go to another part of the condo if I want to.

Yesterday I attempted 5 times, no kidding, to write about the upcoming breast reconstruction surgery. The paragraph kept getting deleted between the preview and posting. So here it goes again.

The surgery is scheduled for 7:30 am on the 15th. I confirmed that it will be outpatient because they do use general anesthesia. When we were discussing it the plastic surgeon said there would be too much pain to consider doing it over a long weekend once school starts. That makes me nervous because doctors usually down play the pain bit. On the internet it says everything from horrible pain to regular tylenol will take care of it. The one thing everyone seems to agree on is that if you are thin the pain is worse. It is one time I am glad to be heavy.

OK, I'm Tired of This

I was supposed to see the foot surgeon today and get my walking boot. Unfortunately he has been out of town and didn't get back today so I was rescheduled for tomorrow. I was definitely not happy. I am so tired of the non weight bearing stuff. I am getting really impatient to get on with my life.

Nan and I had planned for me to go in to campus today. I figured it was about time I put in an appearance. Becky agreed to take me down in the wheelchair and pick me up. Then Nan and I decided I would ride in with her. I hated going in a wheelchair. It is a lot of work to get through though those long halls. And our handicapped accessible campus has all of these walkways with inclines. They don't seem like much if you are walking but in a wheelchair they take a lot of energy to get up. Besides, people look at you funny. I wanted to tell every one I knew "It's just for today, honest."

There were a lot of students in today. Second year students were working on the bulletin boards. They seemed to be having a good time. They did comment that the task behaviors were a lot different when they weren't being graded. So of course I had to hassle them for a while. I have dearly missed my students and having the energy to really interact with them.

The students who just finished their last clinicals were bringing in their final evaluations. They are all done now so are looking for jobs and planning to take the national exam. It was great to see them. They all seemed so confident and carried themselves like clinicians. I love it when that happens.

Hair and Toes

I had the first post-op visit with the foot surgeon on Friday. I was hoping he would change my weight bearing status since the surgery wasn't as extensive as planned. No such luck. I am non-weight bearing for another week. I am using a wheelchair because my balance is so poor that I am dangerous on a walker. Fortunately I have more strength and energy so it isn't difficult to get around the house.

The oncologist ordered a new estrogen blocker which I will start tomorrow. Here's hoping it doesn't have too much of a fatigue side effect. I was so tired of being so tired.

As far as the hair goes I am looking downright scruffy. I didn't expect the growth to be so uneven. The longest hairs are about 3/4 of an inch. There are sections that are much shorter. My hair is so fine that even in the longer sections you can still see my scalp. Like I said, definitely looking scruffy.